I did finally get the heels in this pair of socks. I will just stick to the heel I was taught until I feel that I have mastered it and can move on to different sock heels :P. Now it’s just the feet and toes which will hopefully not take as long as the heels.
I have been lazy in finishing the heels, no not really lazy, unmotivated is more like it. I lost a child right after Mother’s Day almost 8 years ago, and this time of year leaves me lacking the desire to do things. I know he’s with our Heavenly Father, I just miss him. It just hits harder at this time of year, maybe because it’s so close to the anniversary of his death and the combination of it being so close to Mother’s Day. I try to keep everything tucked in so it’s not apparent to others that my emotions are trying to leak out as tears. Some people tend to think, because it’s been more than a year, you don’t grieve anymore (sure we do) or that you can just pick yourself up and get back into your old life. Well life is never quite the same after a death, it changes everything in your life, it turns everything upside down and it will never really be back to normal again, like that picture on the wall that never sits quite straight again after it falls. Oh it does eventually get easier to handle during other times of the year as the years pass, but there are still those very tender times during the year that are hard for others to understand because you tend to isolate yourself so others won’t see your pain. Times when you miss his phone calls, or miss laughing at something silly he said or did. I know I will see him again when my time comes to return to our Father in Heaven, but until then, I just miss him.